ACE: The Roles My Management Team Think I Should Audition For, AND Roles I've Always Wanted To Play

MANAGEMENT:
*Rich Guy Who Won't Go With Poor Girls no matter how attractive, because, "Bro, She's from the other side of town."
*Drunken Poet Who Has Lost His Mirth -- Mirth being the big-bosomed Dutch exchange student in last semester's Wordsworth course.
*2nd Lieutenant who never believes scientists about aliens.
*Hotshot Burglar who exposes his inexperience to the rest of the crew by getting ambushed with a cup of coffee by Robert DeNiro.
*Rookie Priest who poops his pants at exorcisms.
*Nasty Son of Lord Argyle from Argyle Manor who takes liberties with The Help, but won't pay for their abortions.
*Boyfriend From the 1st Act who the Heroine realizes is cheating on her, just as she also realizes her best friend has loved her all along.


ACE:
*Man with Largest Penis in World.
*Rock Star who cures cancer.
*Scientist who invented orgasms.
*Odin.
*A Sexy Wizard.