-- Is it clean? Not really. Are the beds comfortable? These things are relative. Is the hotel 50 yards from the Greater Boston rail system? Indeed. This rating is a great example of intangible quality: if there were a scouting combine for hotels, the Days Inn of the Prattle-Sprawl would not impress with it's forty time, or it's bench press, and yet there's an aura here. Do Portugese ladies in tight jeans and high heels rent rooms by the hour? Often. Do weirdos sit in the parking lot for hours nursing 7-11 Big Gulps? Management doesn't mind. Do I always get a great night's rest here? I do. I don't know why. Intangible.
-- Prattle-Sprawl has two great chicken shacks: Royale Chicken, and Panal Chicken; it also has the best KFC in all of Mass and RI. The best part of that KFC is to reach it from the Prattle-Days Inn you drive by a massive Stop and Shop supermarket, outside of which, at least forty times, I have seen a woman who we call "The Bird Lady of Prattleboro". She has spikey green hair on top, and a long dread-locked mullet in the back; she wears matching green spandex every season of the year; and she must have money for the salon, because she has one of those orange gremlin tans you only get from a booth. I think of her as Prattlesprawl's unofficial Boss -- she runs the streets with an orange fist.
-- True story: One night a few years ago, I was having a bad time at the Prattle-Sprawl with my stomach, (it could have been all the chicken). I drove my truck down to the Rite-Aid for, how do you put it gently, movement aid; the mistake was popping some pills as I walked back to the truck, and washing it down with Dr. Pepper.. and, well, it started to work.. two miles from my Prattle-bathroom. I drove through two red lights, at 60mph, at 11pm, to get back.. As I was braking to turn into the Prattle's lot I saw the flashing lights.. Look, the officers were going to have to wait a minute, yeah? I wasn't going to jail with poo-pants.
-- I got into the room in time. Minutes later I stumbled back out to the parking lot where the officers were waiting; they asked me why I had done what I did. I told them the truth. They asked if I "took care of that". I told them I just had. They told me to have a good night, and they left. Intangible. Magic. Five stars. The best part is right after they left, as I marveled at how the police had let me off the hook, the Bird Lady of the Prattlesprawl casually walked through the parking lot, gave me a cool nod, walked out to the fence between the hotel and the train yard, and disappeared into the night. Give me Prattle.
3 comments:
what no comments is everyons f***ing crazy that was awesome ya i said it awesome.She rules with an orange fist
nice pics too
Pretty groovy.
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