CHAZZ: Top 20 Pickup Lines

Cousin Chazz has decided to become a Pick-Up Guru.  He has insisted we publish his twenty lines guaranteed to score with honeys:

20 I want to be your content provider.

19 Dignity is overrated.

18 Let's drink beer out of whiskey tumblers, and pretend we're expatriates in a Warren Zevon song.

17 You shall not PASS!!

16 I want to be your great mistake.

15 Let's go to your place, get naked, and read magazines on each-other.

14 Once you go Chazz, you delete all your social networking accounts, and start over.

13 A night with me is like a night with Willem Dafoe in the English Patient -- which is to say I'm a morphine-crazed thief with a skeleton face. 

12 My perfect first date would be getting a to-go order of meatloaf, and watching me play Madden.

11 True love is a myth. I am prepared to offer you semi- indifferent like.

10 I want to show you the world. There's DSL at my Mom's house.

9 Ever wrestled a muskrat?

8 You look like the hobbled antelope.

7 I can transact my love anywhere with up to 60% fidelity to what it would be in a bed. Think about it.

6 Ever hang out at the Prattleboro train tracks?

5 What's your sign? . . I mean race.

4 Women are like a beautiful platter of fruit, and I 'm a borscht man. Are beets fruit?

3 I haven't seen this much delectable dark thigh since they shut down the Pollo Campero in Brockton!

2 Do I like women? Welllll... I acknowledge they're a necessity.

1 Yeah, I'm that Chazz.